


Hold Onto Me

by runningfromrealitytoanime



Series: SakuAtsu random fluff [12]
Category: Haikyuu!!, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Attack on Titan AU, Doesn't really follow the timeline, M/M, dont murder me for character death, quite random, survey corps mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23577832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runningfromrealitytoanime/pseuds/runningfromrealitytoanime
Summary: The final battle is drawing near and Survey Corps member Miya Atsumu isn't sure if he could survive to see the next day.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi, Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou, past Ushijima/Sakusa
Series: SakuAtsu random fluff [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1692871
Comments: 4
Kudos: 72
Collections: SakuAtsu Week 2020





	Hold Onto Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! Here is another story based on the prompt for SakuAtsuWeek Day 5: Trust. I always wanted to see an AOT au for these guys and thought, meh, why not try and write one.
> 
> It doesn't exactly follow the AOT timeline but its something like what happened when they went all kamikaze in season 3 part 2 against the Beast Titan.
> 
> Enjoy!

Atsumu just couldn’t go to bed. His heart was pounding too much, his head in a mess as he tried not to think about what might happen to them the next day. So much had already happened so why was he chickening out about tomorrow?

After being in the Survey Corps for so long, it still hasn’t helped him get over his fear of death. Even when he lost so many loved ones in his life, even his very own twin, Atsumu still wanted to live despite all the feelings of regret and missing the ones he had lost. He blamed himself for forcing his brother to enlist into the army with him when he hadn’t wanted to do so, only having done so because one of their childhood friends and his crush had decided to tag along. Three teenaged boys joining the army and later on, the Survey Corps in an attempt to free humanity from the walls seemed like a great idea that time, until they were faced with the reality that they were only birds trapped in a cage.

He could still remember as they rode across the fields, the sounds of the birds being scattered into the sky filling their ears as the sound of Titans chasing after them shook the earth. They had been riding for hours, trying to get away from them after having half of their squad killed off in an attempt to flee back into the walls. They were so close to the walls, so close and yet, it hadn’t been close enough.

“Get back! We’ll cover you!” Ojiro yelled as he took into the air, his blades in hand as he tried to hold off the Titans. Ojiro had been a veteran among them, one of the leading officers in the Inarizaki Squad and he had been taken down so easily. He barely even had time to scream when a Titan swatted him like a fly, his body crashing into the ground in a messy lump. Kita had screamed for him, moving to fight the Titans as the three of them had ridden on, screaming for their leader to come to his senses. They were outnumbered and without any backup and nowhere to run, they were going to be fodder for the Titans.

Suna gave a yell as the earth erupted below him, dirt rising in the air as a Titan came from below them. His horse whinnied as both it and its rider were thrown into the air, Suna trying to get into the air as the Titan reached out to grab him, slowly crushing him in its grip as Osamu screamed his name.

“Samu, don’t!” Atsumu yelled as his twin turned back, his hands already reaching for his blades as he took into the air. He yelled for the Titan to release Suna, the other scout already crushed to death as blood flowed from his mouth. Atsumu tried to turn his horse but his fingers felt so weak and he was so close to letting go of the reins and falling onto the ground in his terror.

"OSAMU!" he yelled, trying to turn back. Why didn't his body let him move?? He needed to save them, when he was the one who dragged them out there only to get slaughtered. He had to...

He turned just in time to see his twin getting crushed by the Titan, his head falling onto the ground as his blood rained across the air. Atsumu had a few guts flying into his face, his mouth opened in a scream as he tried to call for help. The Titan tossed whatever remained of Osamu and Suna into its mouth, swallowing them before turning its eyes on Atsumu. Atsumu screamed in terror as he fumbled for his blades, trying to get them to work when he felt himself being thrown into the air, his horse tumbling to the ground as he thought to himself that he was finally going to die.

He was suddenly in the air, an arm wrapped around his body as a Scout brought him up. He could see the Titan below him, trying to bat away a single figure that was weaving in and out of its body, lacerations filling the Titans torso until it finally collapsed onto the ground. The person’s hood fell back, revealing curly black hair and a face covered with a black mask; Sakusa Kiyoomi of the Itachiyama squad, also known as humanity’s strongest soldier.

Atsumu on the other hand was a coward who couldn’t even save his squad and tried to run away from getting killed.

“Tsumu, you can’t sleep?” a voice whispered in the dark as Atsumu slowly swung his body from the bunk bed, his feet dangling as the person below him sighed, “Just come down here before you kill me with your feet.”

Slowly, Atsumu swung himself from the top bunk, his feet touching the wooden floor with a soft thump as he felt the person below him shuffling in the bed. Atsumu moved to scoot into the bed, his bed partner moving to allow him to lie down and lie his head next to him. Atsumu slowly took a deep breath as a hand moved to cup his face, dark curls surrounding the person’s face as dark eyes looked into his own.

“You’re worried about tomorrow?” Sakusa whispered as Atsumu nodded. He had no idea how he had survived this long, let alone be thrown into a battle where he might not even make it out alive. He knew they were going to have a large scale attack on the Beast Titan the next and Atsumu feared he would never live to see the sunrise ever again.

“I don’t know if I can do this. Every time I close my eyes, I remember my squad dying in front of me. I couldn’t save them. I was such a coward, I let my own twin brother die in front of my eyes. I can still taste his guts in my throat…”  
  


“Shhh,” Sakusa whispered as he leaned his head close to Atsumu, his breath ghosting his lips as the other boy shook in his arms. Sakusa hated being touched by people but Atsumu was one of the few souls allowed to even be in the same room as him. Atsumu wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for him and he had no idea if Sakusa would even be able to protect him in the battlefield tomorrow.

“I’m so scared, Omi omi. I’m so so scared,” Atsumu trembled as he tried to calm down, his breath quickening at the memories of people dying around him. He wanted to block out the sounds of gunfire and death around him, to wipe the image of corpses littering the fields as he tried to close his eyes to get a good night’s rest. He wanted to just be able to feel at peace, but he knew it was impossible ever since he decided to join the Survey Corps.

“Atsumu, I will protect you tomorrow.”

Atsumu didn’t say anything as Sakusa gently pressed his lips against his, soft and gentle as Atsumu wrapped his arms around Sakusa tighter. The other boy groaned as he muttered about Atsumu squeezing his ribs a bit too tight, Atsumu never wanting to let go of him as Sakusa whispered against him.

“Trust me, Tsumu. I will keep you safe.”

…

Sakusa Kiyoomi joined the Army because he didn’t know what to do with himself.

While he hated the dirt and the thought of getting covered with blood, he would rather be fighting on the front lines and control his fate than sit around and wait for people to fight off the Titans in his stead. Sakusa soon found himself rising through the ranks even as a cadet, his prowess in hand to hand combat and ability to operate 3D manoeuvre gear leagues above the others.

The only one who rivalled him was Ushijima Wakatoshi and he remained somewhat an inspiration and rival on the field as he trained. He wanted Ushijima, the so-called strongest soldier of humanity to look at him and tell him he would be able to survive in that world, to be able to defeat the Titans and finally be free from the life trapped behind the walls.

The reason why he joined the Survey Corps was to stand by his side and guide humanity to victory.

He didn’t know if he had a crush on him or if he just admired the man, but one thing was for sure, Sakusa wanted to be by Ushijima’s side. However, time didn’t give him the chance to do so when Ushijima was killed in a mission on wrong, nearly all of the strongest squad in the Corps wiped out within minutes of venturing out into a new location. They didn’t see it coming, hell raining down on them before they could even call for backup. The Survey Corps thought they had lost all hope without their strongest soldier to lead them, so Sakusa decided to step up to the role.

Every day, he would train.

He killed over and over, human or Titan, to make sure he lived another day.

He killed to ensure that Ushijima’s death wasn’t in vain.

So when he stumbled across Atsumu’s squad in the fields close to the walls, he found himself looking into the eyes of a person who feared death, their eyes wide as they tried to run for it. Atsumu was frozen like a rabbit in headlights, blood covering his entire body as he was unable to move. He couldn’t so much scream after what had happened before him, the Titan still munching on the remnants of his comrades as Sakusa’s squad came in to the rescue.

Sakusa remembered Atsumu from his military days. He was too loud and brash for his own liking, always saying he would defeat the Titans and free them from the walls. Atsumu would always be surrounded by others pulled in by his charisma, of his determination to see the light at the end of the tunnel. While his attitude sometimes clashed with Sakusa and resulted in various brawls, Sakusa couldn’t help but wished he had the power to inspire others like Atsumu did, wishing he could smile just like he did and not be afraid of germs and the horrors of the world.

Sakusa eventually joined the Survey Corps under the Itachiyama Squad while Atsumu made his own squad which he called the Inarizaki Squad. They all had capable fighters, its members working together with ease and soon raking in many kills from their missions. They were what would be called an exemplary team, one of the best in the Survey Corps, until Atsumu decided they should try to explore some lands north of the walls when it was considered unchartered territory. Even as their superiors warned them to stay back, the squad didn’t stop as they took off, Sakusa’s squad dispatched to follow them an hour after just in case something happened when they were attacked by Titans.

Those people who looked up to Atsumu were now all dead because of him.

It took months for Atsumu to recover and even then, he couldn’t so much see the sight of blood before breaking down and throwing up. His roommate would report him screaming at night, sometimes even attacking him when he was delirious from a bad dream, having to be isolated on countless occasions to make sure his fellow soldiers were safe.

What possessed Sakusa to take him in was beyond him.

Maybe he saw something in Atsumu that reminded him of his old flame. Despite their stark contrasts in personality, both Ushijima and Atsumu wanted to free humanity from the Titans. Both strove to fight for humanity even when things were tough and the people never thanked them for their deeds.

If he couldn’t protect his previous love, he would protect Atsumu at all costs.

Even if it cost him his life.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this! Check out my other stories for SakuAtsuWeek on my profile (they're basically the main ship I write for now).
> 
> All comments and kudos will be greatly appreciated and welcomed!


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